Sorry, folks, but I feel like crap. And I have for a few days.
In typical 'me' fashion, I don't just get slightly run down, don't get just slightly under the weather. Oh, no...I go for records. Records of ear-splitting pain, mind-numbing headaches, ever-ending chills and fever. Records for being a total bitch to those who have disregarded my 'bark' and come a'callin' anyway to interrupt my solitude and attempts to recover.
I've not been able to hear out of my right ear since early Thursday morning and even though I've been on three separate drugs and ear drops since Thursday afternoon, I can't really say I've seen a great improvement so far. I hurt too much to do anything really...the ear just throbs...and I'm held up in a house that has too much to do in it: planting and weeding in the garden, re-staining the coffee table, doing some tile work on the kitchen table, painting the bathroom walls, getting caught up on some work-related reading. Hell, watching TV seems like too much work right now for the ears. If I don't get any better by tomorrow, I'm seeing someone else as a follow-up (as current doc says only other option is go to the E.R. and have the ear looked at that there, which, of course, my insurance will not cover). The bad news is I think it's trying to be 'social' and now include the left ear, too, in its party. Joy.
Unfortunately, though, I chose the absolute worst weekend to drop out, for my phone and email have been in use pretty constantly despite my pause. And, yesterday, I reached my limit and one poor soul called and got me at my worst when I barked back at them. I'm sorry, it was not deserved. I just simply do not do sick well.
Yes, I missed a Going Away Party at work for two employees...I know, and I am sorry. Yes, I sold my ticket to the Rowdy Fryends show in Greensboro for Friday night...but I'm sure the recipient had a good time. Yes, I missed yesterday's Haw River Festival down in Bynum...and I'm sorry I couldn't enjoy the wonderful weather for it, either. I'm sure I'm missing something today or tomorrow, too, but it can't be helped right now. Please forgive, good people.
Friends and loved ones: I don't miss these things because I'm tired or 'like one more than the other' necessarily (in fact, I tend to go even when I'm overtired, frankly), but instead I missed these things because my body is strongly...very strongly...advising me to take some time off and get well. I appreciate I was missed, I really do; but I also appreciate some peace and quiet when I'm trying to get well. Believe it or not, I am not trying to be a bitch here, I just need some space...and when I do, the limited social filters I do have are some of the first things that get turned off. Not intentional, just automatic.
Needless to say, I am not the Fairy Godmother of Goodness and Light now.